Enjoy Life
Declutter your home, and clear your mind
Keen to downsize, but can’t face the massive clear-out this would entail? Judy Hobson meets an expert who believes decluttering can give you fresh energy
Is your attic, spare room or garage bursting at the seams and you're running out of room to store things?
Whenever you go in, you promse yourself you'll sort out the clutter one day soom, but somehow that day enver sawns.However, you may now be prompted into action if you know studies are showing decluttering is not only good for your mental health, it relieves stress and re-energises you as well.
Over decades many of is have amassed countless possessions- not just books, clothes and pictures, but also jewellery, old record players and computers as well as children's toys. It'ss not surprising therefore that sorting it out can feel overwhelming and that we could do with someone to hold out hand and help us decide whether we hang onto something or let it go.
Helen Sanderson, a professional organiser and declutter coach from North London, says clutter is a reflection of decisions we find it hard to make.
"honouring the past and saying goodbye to objects you no longer need will not only help you create a tidy home that's a pleasure to live in, it will also give you a massive sense of achievement and an energy boost." With a background in interior design and psychotherapy, Helen, 50, is an ideal person to advise people how to set about disposing of possessions that are encroaching on their living space, and over the past eight years she has helped hundreds to do so.
In the maain, her clients are older people keen to downsize but who keep putting it off because they have accumulated so much stuff they just don't know where to start.
Helen says: "They find the idea too challenging and, when they do begin, you have to keep constantly reminding htem of the reasons they're decluttering so they stay motivated."
Clutter, she points out, can be a burial mound beneath which we are hiding some difficulty in our lives. This can bbe related to something in childhood such as attachment difficulties to a parent.
If someone is estranged from their family or country, Helen finds, they often have a strong tendency to cling to objects, as do people whose parents lived through the war and believed in saving absolutely everything.
“Their children take on that psychology because the family’s hoarding normalised the compunction.”
And not dealing with clutter can be a way of avoiding doing other things.
Helen explains: “You often hear people say that when I’ve decluttered I’ll go to the gym, join an evening class, start dating again or invite friends round. What they’re really doing is finding an excuse to avoid doing these things.” Her strategy involves encouraging people to think of their home as a garden and that they are going around it looking for weeds.
“You can’t plant anything new in a room if it’s already full of brambles. Finding a home for things can help.”
Some people she encounters don’t have a special place for items such as scissors or light bulbs.
“As a result,” Helen says, “a pile of rubbish builds up on the side. I get them to draw a planting plan and allocate places for items like these. The next step is maintenance, because if you don’t mow the lawn, the grass will grow. Books and clothes expand so you need to keep weeding them out, deciding what to keep, what to put in the recycling bin or take to the charity shop.”
Paperwork is a good place to start.
“All of us have lots of it, often bills and receipts from 20 years back, that can be disposed of.”
And Helen says: “Ask yourself if you’re turning your home into a museum, a shrine to your memories? If so, you’re in danger of becoming overwhelmed because each object will be vying for your attention.
“By decluttering, honouring and storing memories you’ll be able to create a peaceful atmosphere and feel much calmer.”
When people tell her they have already been through their bookshelves, Helen suggests they go through them again and give the books a dust.
“Every time,” she says, “another load of books goes out. You need to ask, ‘Do I need this book any more or can I donate it to charity?’ For example, you may not be into astrology any longer so books on that subject can go and, if you no longer need to read Shakespeare plays, his works can go, too. If you are uncertain whether to part with something, ask yourself, ‘Do I still need it, do I love it?’
“You should know the answer instinctively, but if you don’t, sleep on it. You’ll often know what to do the next day, having reflected upon it.
“But if you still can’t decide, maybe because you’re going through a divorce, put the objects into a box, label it and deal with it in a year’s time.
“Some things can be too loaded emotionally to go through quickly. For example, you may want to read through any personal letters before letting them go. And if you’ve been bereaved, it could mean you’re not yet ready to let go of your husband’s shirts. He may have died five years ago but for some of us that’s not long enough to be able to let go of his things.”
Older people frequently tell Helen they don’t want their children to have to sort their stuff out.
She says: “It makes sense for you to pare down and simplify when you get older. Ask your children if they want a particular piece of furniture and give photographs away to family members.
“By decluttering you’re making sure that it is your treasures and objects important to you that will be left behind.
“I’ve just helped a divorced woman in her sixties with three grown-up children, who was still living in the huge family house they had shared, to move into a new home.
“She was afraid that by doing so she would be dishonouring the years she had spent as a wife and a mum. She just couldn’t make that move on her own, was stuck in the mindset that she was past it, and the house was becoming her tomb.
“Decluttering and letting go of that house has made a huge difference to her. She is now busy decorating her new home and has even got a new man in her life.”
Helen also recently enabled a retiring business couple who had travelled the world, owned a property abroad and had an office, to locate all their possessions into their London home.
“They desperately needed advice so that they wouldn’t constantly be falling over furniture and bumping into things.”
Sentimentality, however, can get in the way. “When you decide to part with something it can make you feel as though you’re dishonouring a memory.
“For example, if you have done a PhD you may feel you don’t want to throw away the books and papers you invested so much time in, but the truth is you don’t need them any longer.
“We put so much energy into bringing up our children that throwing their stuff out feels like we’re dishonouring them, but you can honour the memories by taking pictures of favourite toys and storing special items in a memory box.
“Remember, the time has come to set yourself free, spread your wings and enjoy retirement.”
Hoarding, she says, is an addiction. “Getting someone to stop is like getting an alcoholic to give up drink. They really must want to do so. They will give you hundreds of reasons why they can’t part with that box of rusty old bottle-openers. You can’t just rip that attachment away.
“It has to be handled very sensitively and the hoarder has to have reached rock bottom and be ready to accept help, and that has to come from a psychologist and therapist as well as someone like myself.” Helen admits she is a born organiser and quite a tidy person.
“I live in a small London flat so have to keep on top of things every day, but I’m certainly not anally retentive about it.”
She has now put her declutter strategy into a box of 37 prompt cards to enable more people to live clutter-free, and has set up a Facebook group where declutterers can support each other while going through the process.
The Home Declutter Kit, which also includes an instruction manual, costs £36.99. For more information, log on to: (www.homedeclutterkit.com).
Are you having a late spring clean? What do you think to these tips?
To keep up to date with all the latest from Choice, or if you have something you want to share with our team, follow us on Facebook, Twitter, Google+, Instagram and YouTube
Other stories in Enjoy Life
Great Christmas Music Ideas
Christmas books - gift ideas
Autumn Reads
Summer 2024 Books
Summer DVDs
Summer CDs
Latest book reviews
May DVD Reviews
May's book reviews
May's CD reviews
That English Riviera Touch
April's DVD reviews
April's book reviews
April's CD reviews
March's DVD review
March book reviews
March's CD reviews
February's DVDs
February's books
Winter books
January's DVD releases
Christmas book reviews
November DVD reviews
November's Music Reviews
November book reviews
October's DVD reviews
October's New CD releases
October's book reviews
September's DVD Reviews
DVD selection for August 2023
September's book reviews
Latest music reviews August 2023
August Round up
August Paperback Reviews
August hardback book reviews
July 2023 Roundup
Pick of the paperbacks July 2023
July 23 Hardback book reviews
July 2023 DVD releases
July 2023 CD reviews
Pick of the paperbacks June 2023
June DVDs
Hardback book reviews - June 2023
Simon Evans CD Reviews for June 2023
Tesco Summer indoors and out
Book reviews
May 2023 paperback book reviews
May 2023 Hardback book reviews
May's DVD Selection
May's CD selection
Round up of April 2023's book reviews
April 2023 paperback reviews
April 2023 Hardback book reviews
More March 2023 must-reads
March - Pick of the paperbacks
March hardback recommendations
Afternoon Tea
March 2023 - DVD releases
March 2023 Music
February 2023 Books Round up
Pick of the paperbacks - February 2023
Book reviews February 2023
DVD recommendations
February's music reviews
Freedom on two wheels
Make do and mend
Foray into the Fens
Christmas reads
Tasty, healthy recipes by Joanne Wood
Keeping fit and healthy with the Green goddess Part 2
Keeping fit and healthy with the Green goddess Part 1
Finger-licking Good! Tasty Chicken recipes
Beauty: Say 'Allo 'Allo to an alluring look
British Library: Palace of the printed word
Look good and feel great with CBD
Interior design: Inspiration for outdoor spaces
Summer fun at Belvoir Castle
Finding Fitness Starts With Fashion
‘In Vogue’ Veg – Cavolo Nero Sales Grow by 14%
Eat Continental and live longer
A life-affirming book... about death
Get Sewing: Floral bespoke notebook cover
Find your family fortunes... for FREE!
Beauty: Get set for spring...
Spanish Recipes: Small is beautiful
The Vegan Revolution
Interior Design: Maximise your living space
Pets need a spring clean too
Visit Family Tree Live
MasterChef: Classic with a Twist
Get Sewing: Quilted pot-holder
Bob Dylan "Rock and Roll music wasn’t enough for me”
Plant Power Day: 7th March 2019
Interior Design: Less is more in minimalist home
A second chance at love
Interior Design: Great Gatsby Cabinet
The rise and rise of the birthday cake
Walking back to happiness
Baking With Veg
Totally Tina Tour
How to take care of your hair over-50
The nation's most popular cake recipes
Your views: Can you help?
Hail the grandparent aupairs
Beauty: Denise Welch "I love the shape I'm in at 60"
The Austerity Olympics
Healthy reasons to acquire a taste for olives
Grand Treats for Grandchildren
Scandi-style Mules for Swollen Feet
Beetroot and Walnut Cupcakes with Cream Cheese Frosting
In your garden: October
Dr Norman Croucher: The toughest summit of them all
Craft Corner: Sweet Easter Basket
Have your cake and eat your Easter egg too!
Interior Design: Moroccan inspired drawers
BR remembered... 70 years on
A gentleman's guide to spring fashion
Why antique jewellery is glittering
New Year, new beauty habits
Cliff Richard "I have a deeper faith now"
Do you remember? Oliver!
What we really look for in retirement living
Interior Design: Wedding bells on a budget
Counter culture: The revival of the board game
Jodie Whittaker: "Doctor Who is all about change"
85 year old Grandmother gains a PhD
Dame Eileen and a Crowning glory
Writing the story of you life
Why winter shouldn't stop you: don't wait until New Year
World' first 'wellness shed' stirs up mindfulness
Growing old is amazing
Don't miss out on the internet age
Prepare to feel ancient...
Hawks: Up close and personal
Studious retiree heads back to school
Garden Expert: Soaking up the sun
Emily Watson "I'ts such a gypsy life"
Here's to you Mrs Robinson
Brits Embracing 'Urban Birding'
Volunteering for Nature
The Secret to Younger Looking Eyes
Anti-ageing Options Part 2
Anti-ageing Options
End of the road for a pop icon
Reaching out to Dementia Sufferers: Sporting Memories Network
Are you ready for retirement?
Afternoon Tea Recipes
Surprisingly Good Wholegrain Recipes: Savoury
Staying safe in the Summer heat: Drowning prevention
Stardust Memories
Baking made easy
Cooking for one
The real cost of your wine